Ghosting. You’ve probably heard about it a million times, and even experienced it yourself. You meet a boy; he bombards you with messages on your phone and all your social media accounts, and then disappears like bubble into thin air, leaving you perplexed and for some, broken hearted.
It’s actually a pretty common story, and even the Duchess of Sussex Meghan Markle was “ghosted” by singer Matt Cardle some months before she met Prince Harry.
So why?! What makes these guys suddenly change their minds and exit without even giving a proper explanation?
Niloo Dardashti, a psychologist and relationship pro from the Big Apple, gives light to this puzzling attitude. She explains that it is human nature for people to feel strongly at the beginning, but when they actually get to know the person deeper, their feelings change. When this happens, people lose the ability to be honest with the other person, so they leave without word.
And no matter how dumb this may sound, being ghosted doesn’t mean that the guy never liked you.
According to Dardashti, a guy who showed interest much likely means he’s into you, it’s just that he wasn’t so much in tune with what or who is right for him because of the overwhelming options and people around him.
Cosmopolitan talked with some dudes to get their side, and here’s what some of these “ghosts” said:
Mark, who’s 22 years old, met a girl in his senior year in college. They went out for over a month. One day when they were out golfing with Mark’s friends, she started complaining about how bored she was, and that she would prefer doing something else. Mark found it annoying, so he just stopped answering her messages.
Dan, 19, met a girl through a common friend. After a week of Snapchatting, they made plans to hang out. They went on top of a hill to watch the sunset, and started to kiss. The girl started to giggle, and went on talking about how she felt sparks fly during their first meeting. This freaked out Dan, and though he liked her, he stopped texting her.
For a couple of times, 26-year-old Axle went out with a woman that her friend set him up with. The woman tagged him in a photo where they were seen together with his friend and his girlfriend. Axle untagged himself because he wasn’t really looking for a girlfriend at the time, just someone whom he can date. Axle eventually ghosted the woman for another girl he met.